Love. Think. Speak. - Love first. Think deeply. And finally, Speak. Will you join me?

There’s no denying that I’m a nerd. I play the clarinet. I have our monthly budgets for the last 12 years in a binder to revisit. I want the Anne of Green Gables eight book collection for Christmas and I love solitaire almost as much as I adore strategy board games.

Opposite of things I love is television. It annoys my husband, but I struggle to find something to watch that I really enjoy. I lose interest as my mind wanders to things I could be doing instead – like cleaning or painting a door.

When the stars align and I do find a show I particularly enjoy, Franklin and I binge watch. I found one such series this month with the Netflix original The Crown.

It’s hard to truly imagine what life around the royal family might be like as I’ll certainly never be close enough to a monarch to learn the ins and outs of expected etiquette. As we enjoyed the ten episodes, I began to really take note of the small formalities.

No one was to eat at the table until The Queen took the first bite. No one walked ahead of The Queen. You were to come when you were summoned and you left when She deemed the conversation to be over. Her closest advisors kissed Her hand and bowed when they entered Her presence and remained standing while discussing matters of state. When you spoke of Her in public, you were to do so with gravity.

While there was wheeling and dealing behind The Queen’s back, her position begged complete deference and those in opposition were often snubbed and exposed for their lack of support. For the constitutionally minded English, The Crown Really Does Matter.

This week I was catching up on some Bible study. One question led me to really ponder The Crown even more deeply. In reference to the first four of The Ten Commandments (Exodus 20), the author asked me to be honest about which I struggle with the most. The third (“You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will not hold him guiltless who takes His name in vain.”) hit me like a ton of bricks.

Before I’m deposed, let me explain. I do NOT take The Lord’s name in vain in the way I hear it cursed in the Stripes parking lot while pumping gasoline. But I realized that I do not give Him, and His position, the deference He deserves.

As a triune God, His presence is always with me. As I move about my daily tasks, I magnify my preferences as I reluctantly come when He calls. I argue and justify when He speaks. I go behind His back for advice and seek alliances, often usurping His position.

The nerd in me will have the following on repeat this week. May The Crown be at the forefront of our minds as we move into this beautiful Christmas Season.

All hail the pow’r of Jesus’ Name!

Let angels prostrate fall;

Bring forth the royal diadem,

And crown Him Lord of all!

Ye chosen seed of Israel’s race,

Ye ransomed from the fall,

Hail Him Who saves you by His grace,

And crown Him Lord of all!

Let every kindred, every tribe,

On this terrestrial ball,

To Him all majesty ascribe,

And crown Him Lord of all!

Oh, that with yonder sacred throng

We at His feet may fall!

We’ll join the everlasting song,

And crown Him Lord of all!

Two things have happened this week that have left me thinking about the role Daddies play in the lives of their children. For many more reasons than I can possibly list in less than 500 words, Daddies Really Do Matter.

My daddy was a good daddy. He told me often that he loved me and was affectionate, but he was physically ill most my life. Except for band activities, he was not an active dad and was not involved in many things outside of our home.

I took advantage of that as a teen. There were many times and situations in my life where I needed him to be physically present. More times than I care to admit, I needed him to physically stop me in my tracks, turn me around, march me to my room, and ground me for a month or two. Or ten.

As a young adult, I had to reconcile his physical absence and the mess I made of my teen years.

It was on my Walk to Emmaus that I found some peace for that deep hurt. The Lord brought a pastor named Jim Kelly to “stand in the gap”. I poured out my heart to Jim and received a Daddy’s kindness and compassion. I’m so grateful for several conversations The Lord allowed me to have with Jim including our last conversation two weeks ago today. Jim’s final, “Hey, baby girl!” will forever be in my heart.

On Monday afternoon of this week, just hours after Jim’s passing, our family took our annual fall pictures. I can’t help but tear up today when I look at the pictures of Franklin with our kids. There are no words to convey to you what kind of a daddy my husband is to our three children.

Eighteen years ago, he declared his love for me and my three-year-old son.

Three years later our daughter Emma was born. Emma will look back on her life many years from now, when she has a little more life under her belt, and realize how very blessed she is to have Franklin.

Four years after Emma’s birth, we welcomed our son Caden. From basketball in the church parking lot to a fresh water bottle every night before bed, Franklin models sacrificial love to each of our kids in very specific and beautiful ways.

Not only is his attention to our children a blessing to them, it’s HUGE to me as their mother. I’m so grateful to parent with a man who’s sold out to loving his family well.

Young men, when you father a child be the man your children deserve. Young women, when you choose a man to give your heart to, chose a man who’s willing to love hard and persevere.

Don’t wait for Father’s Day to love on the Daddies in your life. Do it today!